Monday, December 03, 2007
i can finally play tears in heaven. and as i sing it now, i can feel the melancholy of the piece that eric clapton may have desired to be layed down upon it. i feel so... helpless. as if there's a great tide land bound that i can do nothing to stop. nothing stands in it's path, particularly me. and so, like all others i will be wiped away, the slate cleaned and pure, finally.
as i run my hands over the steel strings of my guitar, with it's wooden inlay, i'm reminded of an age-old riddle. where is the source of music found? is it in the strings? or in the hands that pluck them? i ponder this. without one, or the other, music cannot be acheived. and so perhaps, the answer is " The point where the two meet.", for one cannot create music without the other, and thus the source of music is the union of both factions. much like myself, i think.
i am two parts. one part emotion, one part logic. but more often than most, emotion overrules logic. and so i lose balance. and i lose peace. this holiday, if holiday i can call it, i have discovered this much of me. that all along, i have witnessed emotion cloud logic, and so all actions are determined by mood, and emotional perception, instead of what i should be doing to create a balanced answer. i have lost peace. and i have not felt the lack because i've kept myself in motion. but now, life is at a standstill for me. i've stopped moving. and it's chafing me.
2:34 AM
