Saturday, May 05, 2007
yea man. did 4 laps level 0. :D not fantastic but it's a start. a real start. i plan to do 6 at least morrow.. e key is to actually juz look and follow e person's legs in front of me. :P perverted and slightly sardonic but hey! if it works. hha! yea.. soon mae 2.4 timing shall hit 10 mins plus.. shit la. hong zhou is still damn fast la. 11 mins plus i tink. bugger. muz aim to surpass him. den slowly improve... now mae knees feel a bit dodgy.. bugger. hope they hold out morrow.
argh.. had kyakking course with ODAC last weekend.. ( hehe. ive got 1 star!! :D ) my skin is... not chaotah.. but red. i feel like roasted pig. whole body is damn tender la.. dammit.. hu's e genius hu got me to wear e marist uni. o.O" oh wait. dats me. ahaha. gosh. CMI sia.. now mae arms are like... i dunno. pain. but im not too sure if it's a muscle ache or if it's a surface prob.. cause it honestly feels like a muscle related problem. hmm. dunno. too many pull ups? :P
juz had argument with mae stupid brother and mother. fuckrs keep calling me retarded. damn shit la. dis juz goes to show ODAC is the other family i can realli depend on now fer emotional support. honetly speaking, im damn sick of dis treatment. if dat fucking bitch so much as TOUCHES me again, i'll rip her fingers off and shove down her throat. dis goes the same for dat fucked up demon brother. brother mae ass la. i hav half a mind to lose myself and kill him. my anger is realli getting out of control la. i had to painfully recall algae's log rules to calm myself down.. especially 'sad must tahan' and 'pain cannot show'. so im juz gonna ignore e 2 fuck heads. mother's day is dis coming sunday. my response? *middle finger shoots up* so?
anyway. yea. negative energy does me no good. and im gonna do away with all dese negative aspects of my life ASAP. once i hav a steady life of my own, and wen i can FULLY depend on myself, im so out of dis house. i realli cant take it. not even spartans can take dis. but den again, cannot also must can. i'll try my best.k. angry poem time to take my mind off it.
AWAY WITH YOU
a curse
a blow
mindlessly churned forth
like stinging white froth
you have no idea what it means
but you say it anyway
you do it anyway
what do you know
what do you think you know
you have no idea
because you don't know
a. single. damn. thing.
so away with you. all of you.
into the abyss you go.
the apple doesnt fall far from the tree.
i pray this resounds in your head.
till the eternal meaning of it drives you mad
drives you to your knees
where the bitter sand and grain will sting
and add to the madness.
what little love you had
i can see is gone.
given way to fermented hate.
if you hate me.
it's ok.
it has ceased to touch me.
i am beyond you.
birds have taken me
crows of damnation.
away from you.
to a new place where i can grow.
in the warmth and love that you never gave
that i never felt
know this.
if you hate me,
remember that i hate you too.
i am never alone.
i've still got me.
hmm. angry poem. but i feel beta. but i like dis poem. it's got emotion. poems are the physical translation of the mind's currents. haa.
7:03 AM
