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ah.. finally changed mae blogskin. :D haha. dis one is darker. more me.. AND it's less vulgar. haha. e last one wuz absolute nonsense. rubbish. dis one even has a POEM?! haha. but it's not mine. damn. :P am still trying to figure out how to add one of my own up dere instead.. literally flipping sideways trying to use Gimp. the alternative application to photoshop. whoo... it's good. juz too advanced fer me to figure out immediately.

mae father banned me from going to MI. his way of going about it was that he didnt want me to be in the company of those hu couldnt study and dat i should hang out with smarter ppl so mae grades wud improve.

*pause

imagine how pissed i was. can't? let me help. a LOT of shouting. i mean. ur insulting my frenz. frenz hu can seemingly understand more of me than you ever could. sure.. dey dun shelter me. dey dun provide for me. but dey are beneficial to my very existence, enriching in their presence. yea. i mentioned dis a few posts back, dat leaving these frens behind is hard for me. why am i crying u ask? im ripped in 2 dats why. tks a lot.

oh and guess wad readers? im banned from bball as well. ok. first the breakdancing. now the bball. .... .... the breakdancing i understand. it's dangerous blah blah blah. break neck blah bones blah back blah paralyze blah.. yea yea. i noe. it's ranted all over the place. but the bball?! cmon. hu has actually broked an arm over bball? a leg? and if i do have a tendency to break stuff i wud like to sae that it wuz YOU hu gave me the deficiency in the first place. so am i supposed to live mae life in seeming confinement for your natural faults which u passed on to me? hmm? u muz understand that to me, a life without moving is not a life worth living. im passionate about bboying because it's the language of movement. it has a meaning that can be interpreted. the bball? i like bball cause i worked hard to be good at it. i sucked honestly. but i trained up to be a decent baller. and now here u come. strolling in. and ur gonna try and take away everything im passionate about? not a chance. if im realli passionate about it, no one in heaven or hell or God's green Earth is gonna snatch it from me. NOTE. there are no vulgarities. no swearing. im not angry. im just wishing you could TRY to understand me.

yea... im not actually emoing. im very philosophical today. a first fer me. ... gosh. im missing A3 more den eva... last nite was worse. it wuz realli burning me up inside.. how i'd nver meet gwen mal and nige on the train platform.. our daily talks on everything under the sun.. going to the skool canteen. feeling glad to see the class... more talk. more jokes. laughing. assembly. making fun of the teachers. more laughing. singing the stupid MI song. ( i nver realli did sing it though. utterly refused to.) the classes. the bball. the badminton. the soccer. juz plain being there with everyone. and when i leave for home, i can replay everything in my head as i plug into mae mp3.. and it'll make me smile. god.. it's burning again. hai. im gonna go dance it off. i can douse it out... honestly. im still cold enuf to do dat. im juz not enthusiastic bout doing it.



and that's why. peace out.

:D

whoo.. havent blogged in a while.. :P lazy la... k. went back to skool today. so completely fun la. missed the ppl and the place and the whole lifestyle.. hard to switch lol. yea.. oh and finally got mae shirt!! :D



whoo! nice? NICE! yea. haha.

skipped econs and lit, last 2 periods of the day. wasnt feeling veri rite. should not hav freaking played bball after pe... nearly killed myself lol... couldnt breathe rite and hands and everything vibrating like an osim chair.. yessh. so weak. den i bought a plate of nasi padang, and HEY PRESTO!! instant cure.. haha... :D awesome. guess i wuz juz hungry or wad la. haha! but skipped anyway. went gallivanting wit mal gwen and jaz at j8. haha. so near home. so convenient. :D so like walk walk walk... and yak a lot.. fun. relaxed fun.. ahha. u probably dun understand wads dat bout... but yea.. haha. den took neoprints. o.O" even though i SWORE id nver step in dat.. *shudder* pink place again.. god.. but it wuz ok la. took sum... weird.. pics.. haha!! i wish i had a scanenr so i could get em here.. hmm.. mayb can grab from gwen's blog later.. :P cost me 2.50. yea. a lunch. ahah..

k. im off to rest up. got a bball game on mon.. gotta be in tip top shape fer dat.. haha. peace. :D

argh... sian man... totally flayed out. sick again.. unbelievable. sucks.. stuck at home totally cooped in.. o.O *claustrophobic* haha.. tried to break juz now. but guess im too sick to even hold the baby freeze fer long.. ooh... stomach ache.. gosh. weak. hate dat.

ah.. val wuz saying dat mol's son is a bboy too.. but e really scary ting is dat he knew how to 1990 from sec 1-2. o.O" oookae.. he dun need study ah. u need constant practice juz to do dat sia.. i cant even do it.. embarrassment. ... if onli i had enuf time.. everyday go raffles place break like a mad man.. sure can enter in e nxt floorskillz whereva in SEA it is. hais. dreaming.

miss A3. supposed to see em today.. AND get the awesome class shirt. :D oooh... i hear it's 20 bucks well spent. haha.. hope so la...




here's A3.. :( man. ... i hate being sick.

k la. im gonna give val a call now.. :D peace.

HAPPY CNY everyone!! :D whoo. it's a good one dis year. had quite a good haul. mayb now i can finally pay off all mae lunch debts huh? whoo... jared. 5 bucks. i owe u still. plz come question me bout it.. i ferget easily. lolz... anyway yea.. didnt go to MI on Friday. ... heart pain sia. missed A3 horribly. argued with parents over it again. hais. more headache sia.. anyway. went back to mshs to visit e teachers.. mr low has been discharged from icu and is at home resting. tk god. i mean, scaffolding right? heavy logs and stuff right? shits man... lucky e poor dude is ok and well. wei bin sae he's at home cracking jokes. ... ... dats not too bad huh?

yea.. went to play ball after dat. with.. erm... ah... wait. i hav a very powerful and exceptional memory, capable of storing massive amounts of information. problem? it doesn't last very long. rite. erm. yea. went with shiyu, zy, winson, wei bin and kf. part of the old gang la. same place joo seng... whoo... i played my first REAL game sia... massive improvement. finally wun teo suan like free liao.. haha. awesome. den went fer lunch at new market. bloody ex food. 2 plus fer e skinny bit of otah and sum noodles. yeesh.

sat. ... wad i do? ... oh yea. cooked. or helped rather. whipped up a massive feast fer mae unc, aunt and grandmom. ... on mae dad's side. yea.. massive stuff. woke up at bout.. 8 plus? yea. lasted e whole day... gosh. i wuz completely shagged out to the bottom of my butt sia. literaly stood up the whole day. ANYWAY. plus side. :D installed ps2 into mae room. sure.. the tv is kinda pathetic, but hey! at least it's sum ting.. like late night gaming dats wad it is. :D waha.

sun. today. yea. err. visiting relatives.. all over s'pore and i tink i might be coming down with sum flu or sum ting... shit. o.O" supposed to play bball on wed. or badminton.. guan lin asked fer dat instead of bball... looks like i gotta adhere to the masses. :P haha. consider consider. nuts.. n i juz got a msg from nick saying to bring pe uni on wed.. orh... hope im not dead and dying on dat day.

right need to chabo off. shagged. playing late nite NBA. :D haha. peace.

p.s. read my poem to dat special sum one. :D:D hope u liked it.

im having a very extreme day today. VERY extreme. in the sense that there's extreme good and extreme bad. yea... both giving me extreme joy and extreme frustration, bordering on re-initiating that pent up anger.

the GOOD. class wuz 'celebrating' valentine's today.. haha. i felt so bad, and kinda left out la. i mean EVERYONE wuz exchanging gifts. but i had no cash.. so yea. too bad la. wa lao... yana wuz nice enuf to give EVERYONE a lil sum ting of deir own... :( feel damn bad. cause i realli didnt get any of dem anything... all i had wuz poem i wrote the night b4.. i realli felt guilty fer not bringing anything at all la. so i wrote one that included the whole class. juz reading the bloody thing makes me moody la. i'll explain bout dat later. i spent most of the breaks shooting hoops to keep my mind off things. tk god my blister didnt' crack and tear again. o.O" eww. haha. it wuz realli stinging like mad e past few days... at least now it's beginning to heal.. finally. haha. couldn't dribble properly for fear of opening the wound. but i tink i did kinda well. learnt a couple of new moves AND improved on dat turn ive been recently trying to grasp. :D whoo. pro sia... nxt time can try and take on shi yu.. haha. layups r improving drastically... shots? still kinda shitty.. nth a lil prac and time cant fix. haha. oh yea.. finally got mae beanie! :D wahaha.. awesome.. now i'll be able to break with head protection! haha. safe breaking. o.O if it's actually considered safe.

k. the BAD. my parents are pressuring me to stop gng to MI. dey are INSISTING dat it is COMPLETELY not important now dat i can go to cj. pissing off completely. i mean. it's not freakin completely useless la. it's still the god damn SAME syllabus. and im not completely wasting time at all. fuck i learn alright. i've already fucking proven that im not intellectually challenged by performing fucking FAR up the bar dat u had set. the standard of a retard if i guessed rite. i noe u ppl tink im sum sorta shithead without his prorities rite and dat im probably semi retarded. yea? well u can juz look the other way cause im FUCKING NOT. alrite? AL-FUCKING-RITE? 14 points fer o's is a feat. u gonna keep comparing me to mae god sis? check dis out. same pnts ok. SAME. and PRIORITIES? dun even tink bout taunting me to stay on in MI k? dat will really piss me to no end. let me sae dis. i hav my head screwed on right ok? i KNOW dat studying in MI wun get me anywhere. i noe all the shit b4 u can EVEN tink it. i noe. i stuck to mae choice. cjc. i wanted it. i still want it. no change. but u juz hav to PUSH PUSH PUSH. U R MAKING ME PAY FOR YOUR INSECURITIES. im sick of it. so sick. stop pushing me plz.. im begging u. plz. i noe. i'll let go. juz dun tear me into 2 like dis. plz. it's SO FUCKING hard to let go of my classmates. it hurts. and you're not helping. i dun tink u'd realli now wud u? as usual. fine. keep pushing. im not even sure wad i'd do. so go ahead. i might juz freak out and kill both of u and my brother or sum ting. or jump out the window, cut myself again. step in front of a car. or worse. retreat. juz run away to my place in MY head. a place dats still mine. u can't screw it up dere. i'll juz close the door on u. no more for me. we'll see.

now wasnt' dat emo or wad? ha. yea. im kinda split in personalities... hais. one happy happy laugh like idiot the other super emo. prob is dese two personalities pop up randomly. ... hais. like i said. we'll see. ... peace.


p.s. sum one actually gave me a banana fer valentine's day. :D whoo!

3 days hols. :D whoo. cant beat dat man. went shawn's place e whole day.. shoot ball, ps2... everything.. haha. juz finally got to chance to hang out. met up with jlau too. haha. how wud i describe a person such as jonathan lau? hmm. he's a fatty bom bom. not to keen on the salad. :D haha damn bad la. shawn's fault. now it stuck. but i seriously tink dat jlau will prb stick dat on his msn nick. whoo..

hmm. wonder how val's doin with her course choices.. havent msged her e whole day.. mayb i'll juz blow mae limit and msg her la. ... o.O" i've actually managed to, and im not too sure how, blow mae chat limit. yea. outgoing calls? 2 hours plus. ... shit. so shitted. now mae fone bill is gonna hit the fan like shit on a sunday afternoon in the sun. nuts. oh yea. kinda pissed off cause juz wen i can buy a damn fone, it's freakin outta stock. o.O till nxt freaking mnth. dammit la. so putting off la... hais. cockers.

oh well. on the plus side. gng out with 07A3 morrow. :D haha. beta spend more time with em la. as much as possible.. hais. *gloom* it juz comes back to e fact that im leaving so much behind. oh well. ive to make choices. and it is my decision. best ting i can do is live with it and make the best of it. hais. ... i hate decision making. -_-"

got back O results liao.. whoo... not so bad la. R5 14 R4 9. gosh.. dat wuz damn scary la. i wuz e 2nd last fella to get back the results. so u can tell wad sorta pressure i wuz under.. lol. alan got his first. 18 pnts. he kinda freaked and got happy but he didnt realli noe how much he actually got. o.O" .. rite. and so it goes la. more and more ppl got deirs back. sum freaking and screaming, sum moping and gettin emo on the floor. yea.. james had a mixup. dey told him he got 22 points. he wuz still happy cause he still got into poly. but he got even happier i tink wen dey told him his r5 is actually 16. lol. i wuz freaked out literally wen i heard he had 22. cause our marks r usually in the same range so.. yea. i figured i wuz probably gonna get bout dere la. o.O bad time man... nearly pissed mae damn pants.

quayle didnt help la. juz b4 he did kenneth he took one look at me and said 'jerome! wad can i sae?!' and gave dat SAD SAD look.... ... ... shit. i mean shit. really. i said it outloud. shit. i turned and tol zy shit. (he got 14 too.) shit. yea. so while i wuz 'shitting' away, i tink kenneth got 17. i tink. might be less. so yea. mae time came. i sat my rump down (still mentally shitting), and stared. juz stared. here's a lil skit tingy.

QUAYLE: Jerome! wad can i sae?!

JEROME: ...

QUAYLE: i find dis veri difficult to give dis to u... (puts down result slip)

JEROME:... *quiver

QUAYLE: well...

*long pause (15 counts)

JEROME: *quiver violently

QUAYLE: *looks expectantly* well. you hav an A1 for english and quite decent marks for the others.

*pause (10 counts)

JEROME: huh?

*screaming





well dats bout wad happened la. but more exaggerated if u noe me well. :D haha. yea. here's the breakdown.


eng: A1
chi: B3
Maths: B3
Amaths: C5
Human: B3
Lit: B3
Sci: A1

yea. now im gonna go sit down. not feeling very happy.. church got shit MI oso got shit. church sum tings up i cant sae. but MI i can. i dun wanna leave.. i realli dun. i love the ppl dere so much. but im gonna hav to. too often ive used mae heart to tink. mae brain wants it's job back. i hate mae logic sector.

peace.

whoa... dis week flew by fast man. o.O" haha. morrow is FRIDAY. e day of reckoning.. hais. im starting to get worried la. yea. felt that i probably screwed up on sum papers. ... shits. OK. tink positive. muz be freakin positve bout dis. im extremely pissed with my mom la.. she wuz freakin out bout how my not being openly freaked out bout morrow means im insanely proud. o.O wtf. i mean, im like TRYING my hardest not to loose mae goddamn head and here u r pounding on the door to my frustration? gosh. sum ppl realli hav no EQ wadsoeva.

skool wuz real standard. apart from the amazing ppl hu hang around la. :D haha. yea... LIT wuz cancelled again! oh yea man.. haha. wuz literally grinning throughout flag-raising. hais. feel damn bad. cause e lit teacher had a fever. ... o.O" sadistic eh? haha. but ya la. it wuz cancelled. WHOO. haha. first period. ... Geog. nth much la.. quite a light lesson. juz searching sum data stuff with haemal and joy-joy. haha. working in groups ma... so search like idiot lor. hmm... den p.e. ... frisbee? okae.. seems a bit doggy la. but quite fun. o.O in a doggy way. :D haaha.

yay. break. econs. (bloody nonsense lesson. juz basically slacking me arse off. :D whee.) den YES. bball time. whooha.

haha. i shall fill u in on dat a bit more morrow. now? i need to meditate. im gonna die if i dun. o.O peace.

YEA MAN. 3 hrs +++ of break today! haha... lit wuz cancelled, again. haha. i sincerely tink the teacher is pregnant. :D cause fer celebration! ahaha. so.. naturally to make good use of the UBER long break, played bball. solid sia. haha.i've improved overall. :D zy will be proud man. no longer the floundering dead fish on the court. haha.

oookae. im nver eva gonna play ball wit big no.s of gals on e court. EVA. scream and scream and scream... .... ... wa lao. i one ear cannot hear properly liao. mati la.. how to be big time director. :P shucks. haha.. tks sia guan lin. o.O" SCREAMED rite into mae right ear as i neared for my shot. ... ow. it still rings. haha.

after e screaming and scratching (o.O"), we all chilled at canteen.. literally stoned away. haha. den poor hist ppl had to chabo off fer deir lessons... hais. sad. fer dem la. but wadeva. we hav our breaks to console us.. haa. listened to music and sang like nobody's buisness. ... lucky canteen wuz moderately empty! haha. otherwise utter chaos. a singing banana!! XD haha. scary thought sia.

oh yea. b4 i go. morrow dere's gonna be a celebration fer everyone's bdays! :D weird yes i noe. but HEY! u onli get one shot at life. make the best of it and run the track. :D peace.

i wuz playing bball today. having a really good time... wen the shit hits the fan. k. alvin like comes up to me and confronts me bout me selling him out in lit. e way i put it, u might tink it's sum quiet sensitive kid asking me why wud i hurt his itty weety feelings by doin so.


hur. yea rite.

u can guess the tone now. naturally it didn't go down with me well. so i kinda blew up in his face too. and wad did i get? a threat. "U WATCH OUT." mmmmMMMMM. i love dis. makes me feel alive. i have been fantasising of reali hitting sum one dis entire hol. yea. early bday prez. no more on it sry. im filling too angry. i gotta last e weekend. bummer.